Two Types of Suffering: Which One Will You Choose?

What is suffering in the true sense?

It is the pain that arises when we want to escape reality and choose desires. It is the pain that we feel when we don’t seek truth and live in illusion. It is the pain that we go through when we don’t listen to our soul’s calling and listen to our egos.

Further, everyone experiences suffering in one form or another. No one can avoid it.

But not all suffering is created equal. There are two distinct paths of suffering, and each path has the power to shape our journey and destiny uniquely. The difference lies not in avoiding suffering—because that is impossible—but in choosing consciously the type of suffering we wish to embrace.

1. Unconscious Suffering (Involuntary Suffering)

Unconscious suffering is the pain imposed by life, fate, or God when we do not listen to our inner callings. It is the pain that we feel when we avoid confronting our true selves.

This suffering does not emerge when we pursue meaningful goals. It appears when we avoid, fear, and resist personal growth.

The moment we start feeling nagging dissatisfactions or emptiness, we should know that we are missing something. Maybe there are some dreams of ours that we are neglecting. Maybe there are some repressed emotions that need outlets. Maybe there are some hidden truths that we should take out..

When we do not address our inner conflicts voluntarily, life knows how to make us suffer.

Again and again, life, fate, or God keeps telling us, “Choose your pain…choose your pain”. But most of us don’t listen to this inner calling.

We keep enjoying our comforts, pleasures, and luxuries. We don’t want to break our lazy habits. We become complacent. We start taking life for granted.

The result? Life hits us hard. We feel chronic stress or other body illnesses. We go through emotional breakdowns due to different reasons. We have to endure strained relationships.

And when we suffer, we start blaming life, fate, or God for our sufferings. We feel that it is being unfair to us. We become blind to see any reason or purpose for our sufferings.

Carl Jung emphasized this dynamic when he famously said, “What you resist persists.”

It means that we can’t avoid necessary suffering. The more we avoid it, the more it accumulates. Over time, these ignored realities become heavy burdens and we have to carry them further in life in the form of suffering.

In essence, through unconscious suffering, life keeps reminding us to live authentically. A life full of courage and conscious efforts.

Life urges us to embrace vulnerability, truthfullness, and discomfort of growth willingly—or else it will push us toward these truths more harshly.

2. Conscious Suffering (Voluntary Suffering)

Conscious suffering is the pain we choose, willingly. Nobody forces it on us, we become ready to suffer.

It happens when we deliberately sacrifice our comfort, desires, or attachments to achieve something. It could be anything we desperately want, like achieving a meaningful goal or following an innermost passion.

We just listen to what our soul is saying to us.

It’s like we don’t wait for life to make us suffer, we choose our suffering. We become mentally and physically ready to do what our inner calling tells us.

But this is not an easy path. It demands discipline. It demands sacrifice. It demands persistent efforts from us. It wants us to leave our security and come out of our comfort zone. We must become vulnerable.

Think of an athlete who rises before dawn. He endures relentless training and goes through physical exhaustion. His only drive is a dream—a dream of victory and self-improvement.

Similarly, you can witness it with an artist. They just love to pour their heart into creative work. But to do so, they choose solitude over socialization. They accept rejection and criticism as the necessary price of authenticity and self-expression.

Moreover, conscious suffering is the only source that can give us immense joy, inner strength, and personal fulfillment.

Viktor Frankl has said it aptly,

“Suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds meaning.”

Suffering is Not Optional—Choose It

The ultimate truth is that you can’t avoid suffering. It is not an option—so choose one.

Q.1. Which suffering should I choose?

A. When you choose conscious suffering, you are ready to confront discomfort. Because you are seeking meaning in life. You are looking for authenticity and personal growth.

Conscious suffering transforms you like a phoenix rising from the ashes. But unconscious suffering confines you like a bird trapped in a cage. And that bird is unaware that the door has always been open.

Conscious suffering liberates you, but unconscious suffering enslaves you.

Decide your path and choose wisely.

Q.2. So will I suffer no unconscious suffering (involuntary suffering) if I choose conscious suffering (voluntary suffering)?

A. As we discussed above, suffering is inevitable. Choosing conscious suffering doesn’t mean you will be completely immune from unconscious suffering. Because life is unpredictable, hardships and unexpected pain may still arise.

When you choose conscious suffering, your resilience increases. You gain strength and have better mental clarity about what you have to do next.

This doesn’t remove life’s unpredictability, but it equips you with certain tools to handle involuntary suffering better. These tools are mindset, emotional stamina, and spiritual depth. So when life throws pain at you, these tools help you manage it and find meaning behind it.

You become better prepared to interpret these unexpected sufferings as opportunities for further growth. You don’t see them as meaningless torment.

On the other hand, if you constantly avoid conscious suffering, you refuse your potential growth. You avoid responsibility because you are enslaved to comfort.

And when you keep doing it for a long time, unconscious suffering hits you harder. It makes your life more chaotic and overwhelming. You feel like life is unfair to you.

Unconscious suffering is there for a reason, to teach you some life lessons. But when you are unprepared emotionally and spiritually, suffering appears destructive to you.

Even Friedrich Nietzsche declared that true growth does not come from mere comfort. It comes from confronting the very things we are most afraid to let go of. It could be anything like our identity, our habitual comforts, our small daily pleasures that seem harmless but carry hidden pain.

So choose your suffering wisely.